Sunday, December 31, 2017

Digital Leaders’ Holiday Dots Connections: Kindness vs. Toughness

Be kind both from the bottom of the heart and the top of your mind, to reach the uplevel of kindness.

The holiday season is the time to reflect and refresh, it is also the time to share and give. But doing a few good deeds is just the practice to be kind. The true kindness is the state of mind. As the digital leaders and professionals today, how can you connect the dots between kindness vs. toughness, and let kindness flow from the bottom of your heart and the top of your mind?

Kindness flows from within, from the bottom of your heart, not just floating on the surface: Like wisdom tends to come from within. Kindness goes with compassion and empathy. Being kind is not just about warm-heartedness-sympathy, but also about cool-headedness- empathy. It’s important for connecting the minds and touching the hearts to convey the uplevel of kindness. Actually, the world is making the progress moving from apathy to sympathy to empathy. Compassion touches the heart, but empathy connects the minds. Without empathy, a kind mind with good intention can become the part of the problem, rather than solve the real problem. Empathy conveys the RESPECT which is crucial in the binding of peer-to-peer relationship. Helping others recognize the power of self-realization from their vantage point is the deep kindness. Certainly, you can practice kindness; however, you cannot really see it curing sociopathy. It's a thoughtful mind and deliberate action, it requires the person to commit to the action consistently and consciously consider the result. Kindness could be as hot as flame, or as cool as ice water; kindness has to flow from the bottom of your heart and become the state of the mind.

Kindness is achieved via emotional excellence: Being kind as a state of mind can be achieved via emotional excellence. Being kind needs to have the right mix of high IQ and EQ. We are talking about mindsets/ traits /emotions / attitudes /behavior. No humans are perfect. There are brief moments of envy, brief moments of anger, brief moments of despair, all these images play out on the screen of life. The negative emotions such as the malicious envy evoke the unprofessional or even destructive behaviors to build the walls in people’ minds and tie the knots on their hearts. Being kind is about learning to abide by nature and let the positive dominate the negative. Keep the positive emotions flow. When you become self-aware, when you know the triggers to the emotions, it is very important to own up to your faults. It’s something that you commit to before it becomes second nature which overcomes the negative psychology and drives human world progress. That shows the kindness bigger than your ego. Kindness is a mindset that has to be put into practice on a daily basis before it becomes natural for some people.

Being tough is imperative if only you think it’s the right choice to sow more seeds of kindness for the long run:
Being kind doesn’t mean you cannot be tough, and being nice doesn’t mean you should compromise all the time. Being tough is neither about rude nor about arrogance, it is about grit and resilience. In fact, the mental toughness enables a person to be kind with consistency, without losing the character. This indicates the person with mental toughness can undergo high-dynamic stress, still makes the sound judgment via emotional excellence, and keep positive energy flow. Being kind also doesn't mean you should always take orders or making compromises, being sheepy or say yes all the time. Being tough is imperative if only you think it’s the right choice to sow more seeds of kindness for the long run.

Be kind and be tough at the same time. As humans, it’s understandable to experience negative emotions, but do not let the negative feelings stay for longer than a moment or two. Be kind both from the bottom of the heart and the top of your mind. Practice to think kindly before doing good deeds, and make kindness as a state of mind.


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